Pawpaws can be tricky in NW Pennsylvania. They really want consistent moisture and protection from wind when they’re young, and the grafted ones seem to be more fussy than seedlings in my experience. The pattern you describe of doing well for a year or two then declining sounds like it could be root related, either cold damage over winter or the graft union struggling. Have you tried growing any from seed as rootstock and letting them establish for a few years before grafting? The seedling roots tend to be hardier and better adapted to your specific soil conditions.
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