I like the category “Have at it, wierdo”
That sounds like a ton of work. Have you thought about setting up a “trap” that squirrels could get into but would keep out neighborhood cats/dogs? Then keeping a regular supply of poison in it would be a lot easier than several dozen traps and intense monitoring.
Another possibility would be a larger version of the wheel of death. I used it this spring for Chipmunks and it worked pretty well. The big benefit of it over traps is that it can keep catching them. There were days I found 3-4 in it. Getting a squirrel was rare, as I suspect that they are large enough to either get out, or hold on to the edges. But, you could make a larger version. Not necessarily easily, but a lot easier than maintaining several dozen traps.
