Brother, I have ranted about this topic for years as well as others.
If you’re ever bored as hell, bring up 20 or so nursery sites & prepare to be befuddled by the massive inconsistencies on: how to plant a tree, what zones the tree is good to go in, spacing, spread of a tree, soil prep, & on & on!
I fought this same spacing battle on my trees & still am to a degree. I have dwarf, semi-dwarf, and a bunch of stonefruits, none of which can effectivly be semi-dwarfed or dwarfed, despite what the tag says.
I’ll tell you what I did & see if it helps. On all my semi-dwarf apples, I spaced them 12’ apart (except for my G890 apple I accidentily ordered, which I gave 15’ on either side for some reason), same for my stone fruits. As for row spacing, I did 18’ between them, although I was originally going to do 15’. The only trees I left a little tight were my plums at 12’ & 12’ spacing. I did that after watching Orin over at UCSC talk about how plums don’t want to spread out even with prunoing, they want to go up. On a side note, his video on “Perpendicular V” peach trees was very interesting to me. I think the trees are 8’ apart and that was more than enough.
My reason (IF you have the space) is this… If you were climbing out of a 20-story burning building, would you want your rope to be too long or too short?! Would you rather have a Suburban for a family vacation, or a Ford Fiesta?? In other words, if I have a foot or two more space than I need between rows or trees, I have a bunch of options i can do in my permaculture orchard. If eveything is tight as hell, I’m stuck, or I have to uproot semi-mature trees and move them, which sounds like no fun to me, but which I had to do on 5-6 of my trees due to planting some of them in a hurrry & w/o proper research.
Now I commonly hear “just prune the trees way back if you need more space between rows or trees…” Roger that, in which case I should have just planted all dwarf apples & will now have stonefruits a lot smaller than I intended.
On top of that, I want to be able to walk & drive my lawn tractor in between rows comfortably…
My opinion is err on the side of caution IF you can, & plant other plants in any spaces you my want or need to fill…